Pride?

So I get these posts from Desiring God on my FB feed. Today's really hit me hard.  I have really been struggling with things lately, relationships with my family, stress at work, what I consider loss of closeness at home and with my kids and loss of trust and engagement at work.  These things have hurt me and left me considering whether I am depressed.  If I am, however, should't my relationship with Christ overcome?  I mean He promises to see me through and to never bring what I can't handle through casting my cares on Him...

I guess therein lies the problem.  I am struggling to put my faith into action in the midst of these times.  I realize that nothing comes to me but that which He ordains... So, the things in my life now must be allowed by Him.  And he works all things to good for those who love Him and know Him. So, these things must be working for good... It is hard.

Piper suggests that a low self esteem can actually be unholy if the root is dissatisfaction with who and how God has made you and comparison to others only to be found lacking, or not realizing the acceptance from others seemingly without merit...  That this is caused by a frustrated pride and misplaced high regard for personal import...  Maybe that has always been my issue.  I have struggled to place God first for fear of losing... me.  Still struggling to see others as more important than myself professionally, personally.

That's raw, but it seems to be where I'm at in this journey. I am praying for genuine renewal of my mind and change in my heart.  I long for a true humility and to forget the sting of rejection by man. I am, after all, a child of the king. I'm just struggling to live like one.