What an amazing ship. I had no idea that it was the nerve center and flagship or the Gulf War. Everything about the ship was mind boggling, from the 4 acre flight deck to the massive logistical dance to keep the sailors fed, laundered and supplied. We were allowed to see the command and control areas and the Captains Country and Admirals Country. Very cool. I would definitely say it was the best $20 I spent on this trip.
Something else I had forgotten from not traveling... temptation. There are temptations to do things you just would not ordinarily do from eating and drinking to letting your eyes wander to buying things. It is really unfortunate that everything around you on one of these trips says "indulge." The food and drink flow freely at every event and everyone wants to make a connection. I thought about that a lot last night at one of the larger parties. Watching people and how they behaved, listening to what they were saying, I was struck. I was tempted. I left.
Don't get me wrong, even though I can withstand some temptations, I cannot withstand them all. I struggle and I fail. Then I struggle with self loathing and shame. It is bittersweet that my Lord forgives me even in the midst of my continued failure.
Last week our pastor challenged us that we were at war with sin and even today in my devotional, I was reminded that i have "not resisted to the point of shedding blood." Jesus did. That fact is piercing. I had not thought of his experience in the garden as one of temptation, although the temptation must have been overwhelming to flee the cross. That he would struggle in prayer to the point of sweating what seemed great drops of blood is utterly amazing. It truly demonstrates both his complete self denial and his amazing love for us and devotion to the Father. I am speechless. I pray that I might have even the slightest amount of that desire and love for him that I might resist even more and love even more deeply.
